Petals.

"Petals"-- acrylic & mixed media on canvas. 10"x10"

salt craving.

I miss the water you guys. It's where this small family wants to live, and we aren't sure of how to get there. How is this done? How do you move to a new place, find jobs, find a place to live, with not a single friend or family member around for support?

Maybe it isn't time yet.

Always Learning.

I've had a few moments recently, where I had the opportunity to put my medicinal herb knowledge to use. Nothing too serious, of course--just minor injuries, burns, scrapes, achy muscles and fatigue. But I found myself automatically reaching for certain things, without having to go over it too much in my head. Ginger and lavender bath soak for the aching body. Red clover, raspberry leaf, and nettle tea for anemia and fatigue. Peppermint oil for that headache.

It's such a sweet place when you realize you have learned something, that throughout all those hectic and tired days as a mama, as a business woman, as a wife, that you did actually retain a few useful bits.

make the things.

I've recently been on a crafting rampage, armed with sharpie pens, watercolors, old fabric, and a much-abused sewing machine. I'm doing this mostly for myself, as a way to combat the stressed of chronic illness, but also for the not-too-distant future: my hope is to have an Etsy shop up and running by ________ date. Actually, I'm rather terrified of setting a date and then not being able to meet it for some unknown reason. So I'm keeping the goals small, for now. Stock first. Set date later.

I've been brushing up on online selling, and taking some cues from some of the successful shops I know of. I read interviews with these amazing sellers, and I've often come across the notion that if you are to open a shop, it should focus on just one or two things. I've narrowed mine down into the realm of upcycled/handmade garments and decor + one-of-a-kind watercolor illustrations. But I wanted to ask you all, out of curiosity: do you like when Etsy shops feature a variety of items, or just a few? What attracts you personally to a specific Etsy shop? And are custom orders a must for you? I'm just curious. I know that however I go about it that my merchandise is bound to vary from time to time, as I'm very keen on using what I have available, or in other words, making something out of nothing.

It's a strange feeling, to feel some opportunity and change on the horizon, but to not know exactly what that means yet. I suppose my only real hope for the future is to have a bit of variety. Living with pain every day is something that often feels insurmountable. I struggle daily with feelings of anxiety and uselessness and, sometimes, despair. Up to this point in my life I haven't felt very much in charge of anything, having no choice but to let my body dictate each day. It's taken me a while to find my footing, and to come to the realization that it's okay if I don't do or live like everyone else. I don't have to--it isn't required.

Sometimes it seems like everything I've been through until now has been practice and I'm only just starting to really live.

xo
Brit

A few thoughts and links.

Shortest summer vacation of my life. The boy starts school on Tuesday--and also got out of school later than usual this year. I really do wonder what it's like to live somewhere that's warm year-round. To go to the beach whenever we felt like it, instead of trying to fit it in somewhere during two months of the year.

This has been a weird summer, just off in a way I can't really explain. Everything feels a bit messier than usual, or maybe more careless. The situation in the middle east is on my mind a lot. I find myself muttering to God all day and finding solace in art journaling at night. I guess what I'm trying to say is that I'm afraid and also trying to be brave.

The death of Robin Williams upset me more than I thought it would. I cried. I remember watching Aladdin, and loving the genie like a million other kids did, and I guess I felt like genie died. Like he is gone forever instead of existing quietly somewhere in the world. People seemed so surprised that this funny guy killed himself. I find myself thinking, "Well, YEAH, that's what depression can do." It's a huge, hulking beast that never really goes away, just subsides for periods of time depending on medication and life stress.

Anyway, here are some links to a few "happy" things I've been looking at, for distractions sake:

- These rings by Peg and Awl
- Any and all embroidery by Yumiko Higuchi
- Beth Kirby's blog, which I'm a little late on discovering. Her instagram is quite a feast for the senses as well.
- This video.
- This inspiration filled site.

new painting.

I haven't been "arting" as much as I usually do, thanks to the beautiful weather we've been having. I painted this a few night ago, working side by side with my little boy. He painted minecraft creepers.

busy.

There's a lot of good here. If I can just focus on it, hold it in my mind. Hayden has friends to play with, who live just steps away. We have a second-floor porch that I'm slowly turning into a gypsy-ish, private sitting spot, to drink coffee or wine in, to talk into the evening. The tree's are close, allowing me to observe the birds. I've made friends with a plump, male cardinal. He likes to show off.