something to think about.

"When I am consumed by my problems--stressed out about my life, my family, my job--I actually convey the belief that I think the circumstances are more important than God's command to always rejoice. In other words, that I have a 'right' to disobey God because of the magnitude of my responsibilities."

--Francis Chan, Crazy Love

8.

My guy is 8 today. I love you Hayden. You are my breath of life.

so much red.

Writing. Revisiting poems both recent and years old--the latter being pretty terrible. I'm slowly weeding out the cliches, and learning all over again how to simplify my message. I keep walking away and coming back to it, probably taking breaks and thinking more than getting words on a page, but I'm determined to be kind to myself. It's been almost 8 years since I've adhered to any sort of creative schedule, and the going is mighty slow, for now.

Which reminds me, I need to remember how to write a stellar query letter. Another bag of dusty bones to drag out and unpack. It's all very exciting though, if only a little tedious. Writing again feels right and familiar, and feels like going home.

Hive

The room is filled

with late-day light.

We sip our coffee

inside a genie's lamp

inside a honeybee hive

Paper cranes dot the table,

lay across the floor

like tipped over canoes.

made from grocery lists

love notes

and reminders

Slanted writing on wings and belly.

You help me thread twine through

the sharp neck folds--

they hang like animal-clouds

above our heads.

the room with honey light

paper

coffee

and flightless thought

reading.

"You have to find a mother inside yourself. We all do. Even if we already have a mother, we still have to find this part of ourselves inside."

--Sue Monk Kidd, The Secret Life of Bees

days, long and happy.

We are at home a lot right now. I often think way too much, but end up very satisfied and mellow at the end of the day. I need to constantly remind myself that it's okay to want and enjoy a quiet life.

We are all also feeling sort of off, queasy and easily tired. Could be fighting off a dreaded virus--our luck is going to run out at some point. If you need me, I'll be making rose hip tea and cooking food with lots of garlic.

petals.

We've reached that point in winter that we inevitably reach, when sheer boredom sets in, when my mommy-mind is exhausted and won't turn over any new, fun ideas. Painting is one thing that always brings the spark back, especially when it is full of color and mess and absolutely no boundaries.

I'm curious, what do you do to fill yourself back up?